There has been plenty written about the dangers of online bullying and internet anonymity which encourages people to act like total ass hole fools who fulfill their dreams of being more confrontational through their alter ego online. This is a well documented phenomenon, most notably visible on forums such as the comment trail underneath CNN’s articles.
I try so very hard not to read these comments because most of them are left by so called “trolls” who make statements which may or may not be in keeping with their own beliefs and then wait for people to go all ape shit crazy on each other. All while the troll giggles from behind the computer in their mom’s basement, proud as a papa of the madness they created.
Again, I try to avoid reading the comments of bored morons, but what I am bothered with today is the non-anonymous meanness left on sites like Facebook or through Twitter. I wonder if people realize that we can see them? You do know that if you post something in your status, then all 500 or however many friends you have will be able to view it? See how it works is, not just the ones you want to see it will, but like, EVERYONE will see it.
A secret no longer is a secret when it is right there on Facebook for all to see. Today I saw someone belittle a common topic they noticed amongst their friends’ status updates. See, all your friends who posted about that subject can read about the fact that you think their posts are stupid!! Did you not know that? I felt like saying “that was way harsh, Tai.”
Now, this is not to say that I agree with everything everyone states or that I don’t think that some statuses are inane or repetitive. But I do try to think through every status I post so as not to insult or belittle my friends. Yes statuses can get ridiculous or flat out pointless, however when I choose to “friend” someone it means that I will be seeing what THEY want to post, not what I would like for them to post. I do have the choice to block them, unfriend them, or God forbid….Leave Facebook!! AAAHHHHHhhhhhhhhh!
I try very hard on a daily basis not to be mean. My advice is “don’t be a mean girl;” no one likes a mean girl after High School! I didn’t even like them IN High School. Maybe I would have if they were Lindsay Lohan but for the most part they are not likeable members of society/Facebook/twitter.
We all have the option to “like” a status or to leave it. I will continue to post about what I think is interesting and you do the same. If I post about something that you disagree with, think is dumb or just hate more than feet flavored ice cream, then please just make fun of me behind my back unless you plan to tell me straight to my face that you hate my favorite things. I bet you won’t…
By the way, Jo Calderone is the hottest piece of hotness to ever walk the hot earth. Disagree? I don’t care, I will post it anyway!!!
Monday, August 29, 2011
Don't be so mean, you mean old meanie
Monday, August 8, 2011
Shark Bait, Ooh Ha Ha
When Cristy and I first met, she was suspicious that I might be the kind of chick who during camping trips sits in the tent with a fan and a portable feather bed complaining about the ants and the heat. On the contrary I actually enjoy camping; I love packing all the essentials and arranging the camp site. I especially love sitting by a camp fire with friends and listening to music or catching up on all the things we forget to talk about during our crazy day to day lives.
That being said, when I am camping and a number of things are all going wrong at the same time, and those things are making me increasingly more uncomfortable, then I can get a little bit upset. Cristy might call it hysterical, I just say “upset.”
So, all was well with the world when we went to bed Friday night. No rain as predicted, air mattress had no leaks which meant I wouldn’t spend the night with my shoulder blade digging into the ground and Koda was only barking at every other person rather than all so that was impressive. Around 1:00am I woke up because my bug bites were starting to materialize on my feet and itched like crazy. Why bug bites on feet itch 20 times more than bug bites other places I might never know, but they were huge and itchy. The first solution I came up with to avoid sitting up (which as we all know makes you more awake and less likely to fall right back asleep) was to rub my feet on the sheets. This worked surprisingly well which then alerted me to the fact that half of the sand from the campsite was now inside our tent and in our sheets (thanks Koda.) The sand helped me scratch those bug bites (which I am now convinced were inflicted by those giant mosquitoes from Jumanji,) however sand in sheets is not conducive to sleeping.
After more feet rubbing and scratching my irritability level was reaching dangerous levels as I noticed not only the abundance of sand but the fact that I was sweating like a polar bear wearing fleece pajamas in the Sahara and I also now had to pee. Not the kind where you can ignore it, lay on your side and go back to sleep but the kind where your body is saying “get the hell up you idiot.”
I crawled over Cristy and the dog, searched for my flip flops for what felt like 20 minutes and limped (I am still recovering from a broken toe) out of the tent and over to a patch of grass to squat. As you may or may not know, toes are very important in balance. That combined with the dark, no glasses and the fact that I was slightly delirious from being woken up by the Jumanji Bug Bites all meant that what should have been a quick pee was anything but. It was 10 minutes of misery. Ready to fall back into my beachy bed and attempt to sleep, I limped and wobbled back to the tent, only to hear Cristy ask me to get the Oreos because her sugar was dropping.
This is where I started to loose it. It took me 10 minutes to pee right next to the tent (downhill away from the tent of course) so how long was it going to take me to get to the car and back!? I literally cried and whimpered the whole way to fetch the cookies and the whole way back to the tent. I knew it was irrational but hey, it was 1:30am and I was not quite myself, OK?
As we settled in and I waited for the crunch crunch of cookies to stop so we could go back to sleep, I started to hear noises. At first I figured it was just my delirious mind playing tricks on me. I mean, giant Jumanji Mosquitos don’t REALLY exist!? All of a sudden a large Beast started hurling it self against the window of our tent from the outside. I was prepared for the worst, I started trying to explain to Cristy what was happening as she was yelling at Koda. She assumed it was simply Koda bouncing off the tent walls on the inside like a pin ball. By the time she realized that there was a Beast trying to enter our tent by force head first like an Angry Bird, the Beast was trying to come through the door on her side of the tent now! She was literally pushing it away with her fist from inside the tent as I retreated to fetal position in the dead center of the air mattress. We felt like bait inside a shark cage at the bottom of the ocean, no where to hide as we awaited our gruesome fate. I call this animal the Beast because what turned out to be a dog reminded me of the Beast from the movie The Sandlot. Once Cristy was brave enough to go outside it turned out all this Pit Bull wanted was to play with us or Koda. Cristy returned the dog to its drunk and stoned owners who were confused how the dog could be attacking our tent while simultaneously sleeping in their tent. Cristy had to try to explain that the dog was NOT, in fact, sleeping in their tent.
Once the adrenaline wore off and our friends Sarah and Mel were convinced that we were not dead and the Beast was not going to be attacking either of our tents any time soon, we all drifted off to a sandy, itchy, hot sleep.
The next day arrived and proceeded without any more incidents. Lunch, drinks, dinner, wading in the river, reading, talking and relaxing. All the things camping is supposed to be. Cristy and I were tired early that night due to the previous night’s brush with doggie death so we retired at 10:00. I tell you it wasn’t 10 minutes after we laid down when I heard it. BOM bom bom bom, BOM bom bom bom. Tribal drums! Coming from the camp site next to us! Now, I don’t know if you have ever tried to sleep through tribal drums before, but it is simply impossible. I can only conclude that this drummer was the one who had summoned the Jumanji Mosquitoes because it was the very same drum beat from that movie. The VERY SAME!
I grabbed up the new lantern flashlight we had brought because it had the most light and stomped over to that campsite. I was prepared for the worst and figured Cristy, Mel and Sarah would have my back if it turned out to be a site full of drunken sumo wrestlers or something. On the contrary it was 4 or 5 middle aged ladies with a single drum.
I started mumbling at them about dogs and sleeping and drumming making me insane and I told those ladies that unless tribal drumming was part of their religion they better quit. They did quit so I must have looked pretty intense with my crazy bed hair and psycho eyes, shining that light in their startled faces.
The next morning all was quiet again just like the morning before. I would say I thought these events might have been dreams except for the fact that there were witnesses. Next camping trip I think I might step up the high maintenance factor (Cristy already assumed this to be the case so might as well give in) and bring a sound machine, a fan, citronella lamps, a dust buster, and I don’t know, steel plated walls for the tent?
I would like to make a quick disclaimer about this blog, if you have never seen The Sandlot, Finding Nemo or Jumanji then this was probably not very funny, my apologies.
That being said, when I am camping and a number of things are all going wrong at the same time, and those things are making me increasingly more uncomfortable, then I can get a little bit upset. Cristy might call it hysterical, I just say “upset.”
So, all was well with the world when we went to bed Friday night. No rain as predicted, air mattress had no leaks which meant I wouldn’t spend the night with my shoulder blade digging into the ground and Koda was only barking at every other person rather than all so that was impressive. Around 1:00am I woke up because my bug bites were starting to materialize on my feet and itched like crazy. Why bug bites on feet itch 20 times more than bug bites other places I might never know, but they were huge and itchy. The first solution I came up with to avoid sitting up (which as we all know makes you more awake and less likely to fall right back asleep) was to rub my feet on the sheets. This worked surprisingly well which then alerted me to the fact that half of the sand from the campsite was now inside our tent and in our sheets (thanks Koda.) The sand helped me scratch those bug bites (which I am now convinced were inflicted by those giant mosquitoes from Jumanji,) however sand in sheets is not conducive to sleeping.
After more feet rubbing and scratching my irritability level was reaching dangerous levels as I noticed not only the abundance of sand but the fact that I was sweating like a polar bear wearing fleece pajamas in the Sahara and I also now had to pee. Not the kind where you can ignore it, lay on your side and go back to sleep but the kind where your body is saying “get the hell up you idiot.”
I crawled over Cristy and the dog, searched for my flip flops for what felt like 20 minutes and limped (I am still recovering from a broken toe) out of the tent and over to a patch of grass to squat. As you may or may not know, toes are very important in balance. That combined with the dark, no glasses and the fact that I was slightly delirious from being woken up by the Jumanji Bug Bites all meant that what should have been a quick pee was anything but. It was 10 minutes of misery. Ready to fall back into my beachy bed and attempt to sleep, I limped and wobbled back to the tent, only to hear Cristy ask me to get the Oreos because her sugar was dropping.
This is where I started to loose it. It took me 10 minutes to pee right next to the tent (downhill away from the tent of course) so how long was it going to take me to get to the car and back!? I literally cried and whimpered the whole way to fetch the cookies and the whole way back to the tent. I knew it was irrational but hey, it was 1:30am and I was not quite myself, OK?
As we settled in and I waited for the crunch crunch of cookies to stop so we could go back to sleep, I started to hear noises. At first I figured it was just my delirious mind playing tricks on me. I mean, giant Jumanji Mosquitos don’t REALLY exist!? All of a sudden a large Beast started hurling it self against the window of our tent from the outside. I was prepared for the worst, I started trying to explain to Cristy what was happening as she was yelling at Koda. She assumed it was simply Koda bouncing off the tent walls on the inside like a pin ball. By the time she realized that there was a Beast trying to enter our tent by force head first like an Angry Bird, the Beast was trying to come through the door on her side of the tent now! She was literally pushing it away with her fist from inside the tent as I retreated to fetal position in the dead center of the air mattress. We felt like bait inside a shark cage at the bottom of the ocean, no where to hide as we awaited our gruesome fate. I call this animal the Beast because what turned out to be a dog reminded me of the Beast from the movie The Sandlot. Once Cristy was brave enough to go outside it turned out all this Pit Bull wanted was to play with us or Koda. Cristy returned the dog to its drunk and stoned owners who were confused how the dog could be attacking our tent while simultaneously sleeping in their tent. Cristy had to try to explain that the dog was NOT, in fact, sleeping in their tent.
Once the adrenaline wore off and our friends Sarah and Mel were convinced that we were not dead and the Beast was not going to be attacking either of our tents any time soon, we all drifted off to a sandy, itchy, hot sleep.
The next day arrived and proceeded without any more incidents. Lunch, drinks, dinner, wading in the river, reading, talking and relaxing. All the things camping is supposed to be. Cristy and I were tired early that night due to the previous night’s brush with doggie death so we retired at 10:00. I tell you it wasn’t 10 minutes after we laid down when I heard it. BOM bom bom bom, BOM bom bom bom. Tribal drums! Coming from the camp site next to us! Now, I don’t know if you have ever tried to sleep through tribal drums before, but it is simply impossible. I can only conclude that this drummer was the one who had summoned the Jumanji Mosquitoes because it was the very same drum beat from that movie. The VERY SAME!
I grabbed up the new lantern flashlight we had brought because it had the most light and stomped over to that campsite. I was prepared for the worst and figured Cristy, Mel and Sarah would have my back if it turned out to be a site full of drunken sumo wrestlers or something. On the contrary it was 4 or 5 middle aged ladies with a single drum.
I started mumbling at them about dogs and sleeping and drumming making me insane and I told those ladies that unless tribal drumming was part of their religion they better quit. They did quit so I must have looked pretty intense with my crazy bed hair and psycho eyes, shining that light in their startled faces.
The next morning all was quiet again just like the morning before. I would say I thought these events might have been dreams except for the fact that there were witnesses. Next camping trip I think I might step up the high maintenance factor (Cristy already assumed this to be the case so might as well give in) and bring a sound machine, a fan, citronella lamps, a dust buster, and I don’t know, steel plated walls for the tent?
I would like to make a quick disclaimer about this blog, if you have never seen The Sandlot, Finding Nemo or Jumanji then this was probably not very funny, my apologies.
Friday, August 5, 2011
Memories
Left and then a right, right at the dead end, turn onto Arbor Ct. As the car carried me through the physical directions to arrive at my childhood home last weekend, it also moved me through a collection of memories. Like a ride vehicle through my life at a different time, my car seemed to know where to go so that I could participate in the scenes.
There in Louisville, in Anchorage, at my Church and all the places where a younger me visited so often with people who were also younger then; it was all slightly overwhelming for an extra emotionally able person like myself. Emotionally able – this is the PC term I have coined for people such as myself, don’t make fun.
Haven moved away from my hometown years ago and since my parents have moved as well, coming home to Louisville is a bizarre and unique experience for me. Things have changed and new people have moved in, all while I was living life somewhere not too far away, but not close enough. It is a home in which I have no specific place. Like visiting an old job and expecting your cubicle to be the way you left it, people shouldn’t have aged, married, moved or changed things from the way they were.
I usually get that tight chested feeling of avoiding tears as I get closer to familiar areas and it all culminates with some weeping on Arbor Ct. In the past I always assumed these emotions were due to the inevitable onset of happy memories and friendly sights. This past visit I realized an additional reason for the tears is a bit darker. Seeing my childhood home and the homes of my friends is a terrifying reminder of how fast life passes by. I don’t feel 32, I feel that it was not long ago at all when I was playing freeze tag in that front yard. My memories feel fresh and awakened on my cul-de-sac in Anchorage. If they are so easily accessed and poignantly recent then how quickly will the next 20 years pass by!?
Kids that were my friends have their own kids now, an entire generation has evolved while I was living my life in another place.
Melancholy as it sounds; I feel this duplicitous sense of emotional attack every time I go home to Louisville. However it would never stop me from visiting and I cherish every memory of my safe and happy childhood. Those people and places that bring a tear and a smile are those that shape my feelings, my past and my sense of self.
Watching Paul McCartney in concert last night I began to notice this sentiment in many faces of fans who were likely wondering how time had passed so quickly from when they were watching Paul and the rest of the Beatles on their first Black and White TV. Luckily for everyone this expression morphed into joy for the fans as the concert powered on. Perhaps this is why Paul plays for 3 hours (he is a machine, I tell you!) 2 hours for reflections on time and life and a final hour for giving into the memory and embodying your younger self. Heck, Paul was rocking it out at almost 70 years old so maybe we don’t really need to worry about time at all!
There in Louisville, in Anchorage, at my Church and all the places where a younger me visited so often with people who were also younger then; it was all slightly overwhelming for an extra emotionally able person like myself. Emotionally able – this is the PC term I have coined for people such as myself, don’t make fun.
Haven moved away from my hometown years ago and since my parents have moved as well, coming home to Louisville is a bizarre and unique experience for me. Things have changed and new people have moved in, all while I was living life somewhere not too far away, but not close enough. It is a home in which I have no specific place. Like visiting an old job and expecting your cubicle to be the way you left it, people shouldn’t have aged, married, moved or changed things from the way they were.
I usually get that tight chested feeling of avoiding tears as I get closer to familiar areas and it all culminates with some weeping on Arbor Ct. In the past I always assumed these emotions were due to the inevitable onset of happy memories and friendly sights. This past visit I realized an additional reason for the tears is a bit darker. Seeing my childhood home and the homes of my friends is a terrifying reminder of how fast life passes by. I don’t feel 32, I feel that it was not long ago at all when I was playing freeze tag in that front yard. My memories feel fresh and awakened on my cul-de-sac in Anchorage. If they are so easily accessed and poignantly recent then how quickly will the next 20 years pass by!?
Kids that were my friends have their own kids now, an entire generation has evolved while I was living my life in another place.
Melancholy as it sounds; I feel this duplicitous sense of emotional attack every time I go home to Louisville. However it would never stop me from visiting and I cherish every memory of my safe and happy childhood. Those people and places that bring a tear and a smile are those that shape my feelings, my past and my sense of self.
Watching Paul McCartney in concert last night I began to notice this sentiment in many faces of fans who were likely wondering how time had passed so quickly from when they were watching Paul and the rest of the Beatles on their first Black and White TV. Luckily for everyone this expression morphed into joy for the fans as the concert powered on. Perhaps this is why Paul plays for 3 hours (he is a machine, I tell you!) 2 hours for reflections on time and life and a final hour for giving into the memory and embodying your younger self. Heck, Paul was rocking it out at almost 70 years old so maybe we don’t really need to worry about time at all!
Paul McCartney Set List 8/4/11
Thursday 4th August 2011 - The Great American Ball Park, Cincinnati, USA
1.Hello Goodbye
2.Juniors Farm
3.All My Loving
4.Jet
5.Drive My Car
6.Sing The Changes
7.Night Before
8.Let Me Roll It
9.Paperback Writer
10.Long And Winding Road
11.1985
12.Let 'Em In
13.Maybe I'm Amazed
14.I've Just Seen A Face
15.I Will
16.Blackbird
17.Here Today
18.Dance Tonight
19.Mrs Vanderbilt
20.Eleanor Rigby
21.Something
22.Band On The Run
23.Obla Di Obla Da
24.Back In The USSR
25.I've Gotta Feeling
26.A Day In The Life
27.Let It Be
28.Live And Let Die
29.Hey Jude
Encore
30.Lady Madonna
31.Day Tripper
32.Get Back
Second Encore
33.Yesterday
34.Helter Skelter
35.Golden Slumbers
1.Hello Goodbye
2.Juniors Farm
3.All My Loving
4.Jet
5.Drive My Car
6.Sing The Changes
7.Night Before
8.Let Me Roll It
9.Paperback Writer
10.Long And Winding Road
11.1985
12.Let 'Em In
13.Maybe I'm Amazed
14.I've Just Seen A Face
15.I Will
16.Blackbird
17.Here Today
18.Dance Tonight
19.Mrs Vanderbilt
20.Eleanor Rigby
21.Something
22.Band On The Run
23.Obla Di Obla Da
24.Back In The USSR
25.I've Gotta Feeling
26.A Day In The Life
27.Let It Be
28.Live And Let Die
29.Hey Jude
Encore
30.Lady Madonna
31.Day Tripper
32.Get Back
Second Encore
33.Yesterday
34.Helter Skelter
35.Golden Slumbers
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Contribution to a Pawn Shop
To protect myself from liability we will call the criminal in this story “C.” Although C is such an inept criminal he decided to steal from someone who just enrolled him in college. Someone who because of that fact has his address, date of birth, phone numbers, social security number, email address, mom’s name and mom’s email address. I’m just sayin….
I frequently meet with students who display characteristics similar to C. Been in trouble with the law, quiet, ask the same questions twice, head outside to their car to smoke frequently, cant follow simple instructions like “wait for me here.” However in retrospect these things were warning signs of what would happen at my desk.
Many admissions representatives had attempted to get C to come in for a campus visit in the past, including myself. He had no-showed quite a few times so when I called him yesterday I was surprised to hear him say that he wanted to come in that very day and that he was so sorry he missed his last appointment. (He was probably busy stealing cars and punching old ladies in the face.)
C made quite a few excuses to go out to his car through the interview and enrollment process and I assumed it was to smoke. He might have been smoking something other than cigarettes because he frequently would ask the same questions more than once. After my Director met with C, I left him at my desk so I could go make copies and let Financial Aid know that he would be coming over to sit with them. I left C at my desk, with my iphone plugged in on the right hand side and my purse sitting in the cabinet unlocked. While most everything else after this point went incredibly badly for poor C, this opportunity was perfect and he took the phone. I have left that phone plugged in on my desk in front of every student who has ever come to meet with me, so I suppose this was bound to happen but I am simply shocked by C’s actions. How in the world is the likely $20 profit from the phone worth the moral implications of theft against someone who has been so helpful!? I mean, he indicated he was hungry and I brought him Pizza from Orientation for God’s sake!!! I felt like Giselle in Enchanted when she sits down all sweet and cuddly with that old man on the street and he smiles then takes her tiara off her head and runs away. “You…..Are not a very nice old man!!”
While C met with Financial Aid to size up David’s cubicle for more possible loot, I was back at my desk looking for my phone. I quickly determined that I hadn’t taken it anywhere, it was not at the desk and therefore C had taken it. My Director went with me to the FA office, and from the cube next to David’s we called my phone. Now the phone was on silent but I was hoping I could hear it buzz. Oh was I ever in luck, not only did it buzz, but C, being the not so savvy criminal that he is, pulled the thing out of his pocket to silence the buzzing. All this I witnessed as I casually walked by!! So now I had the evidence but needed to determine my move.
The Director of the school advised that we could not accuse him (even though it was IN HIS HANDS) so I walked back over and simply asked him if he accidentally picked the phone up. Well now I have never seen someone’s eyes expand to the circumference that his did at that moment. He is lucky those things didn’t pop right out of his head while he answered that no, he just had his own phone. This is when he pulled his own phone out of the pocket that my phone had been in when I walked by. So C must have panicked when he saw me stroll by and decided the best way to not get busted was to simply move the phone to a different pocket.
At this point I realized that I was actually going to have to let this punk walk out the door and go home with my phone and there was nothing what so ever I could do about it. Off he went into the horizon, the proud owner of my cute little iphone with all my PETA and Disney apps in its case that my friend Becca gave me. I knew I would never see it again and was already dreading the craptastic flip phone from 1989 I would have to buy to replace it because I can not bring myself to buy a new iphone at retail!
As soon as C walked out of the building, my phone started going to voicemail when everyone called it. I guess he didn’t want to talk to my friends, how rude. Cristy came up to the school to assist in the investigation but more to prevent the melt down she predicted over this phone situation. We called the police and had my service suspended on the phone. When the police man (I am going to call him Frank but in reality I didn’t get his name which I feel really badly about because I would like to write him a thank you letter) arrived I gave him the whole story along with all of the contact information that we had for C. Frank called C’s home phone, where C lives with his Mom, so his Mom answered the call. Mom gave Frank C’s cell phone number so we could call him on that line. So guys, get this, C ANSWERED the phone and spoke to Frank! It was unbelievable. The conversation went something like this:
Frank: “I want you to think very carefully about how you answer this question because the consequences could be severe. Did you accidentally pick up a cell phone when you visited Brown Mackie College today?”
C: “Yes, I did.”
Frank: “Bring the phone back up to the school now and you will not get in trouble.”
C: “Ok, I was already on my way to bring it back, but I am scared because I don’t want to have to see Ann.” (GUILT!)
Frank: “Well dude, you are just going to have to man-up and do it.”
Well of course I assumed he was just trying to get Frank off the phone, but maybe, just maybe, he would bring that phone back to me!! We waited, we paced, we took bets, we examined every car that came into the parking lot (by the way, sorry to the chick that was picking up her boyfriend from classes, you probably felt uncomfortable when you pulled up and two girls and a cop pointed and studied your car and demeanor wondering if you were C’s girlfriend sent in his place. That must have been awkward.)
Soon enough, lo and behold C drove up with my phone, got out of his car, and handed that thing right back to me!! I couldn’t believe it. He apologized for the “accident” because my phone “fell into his books” of which he had none, and said he thought my phone was his, even though he then had two phones. Whatever, I thanked him for bringing it back and we watched him walk off muttering with his head down about how he felt so stupid. Yeah, buddy, I bet you do.
To make this story even funnier (funny now, not funny then. Actually it was even kind of funny then) C’s reason for signing up for the Business Program at our college is so that he and his buddy can open up their own Pawn Shop! So one could say that he was simply stocking inventory, not stealing.
It remains to be seen whether C will show up for Financial Aid and Orientation tomorrow. With all the phone hubbub I forgot to remind him about his appointments, silly me.
I frequently meet with students who display characteristics similar to C. Been in trouble with the law, quiet, ask the same questions twice, head outside to their car to smoke frequently, cant follow simple instructions like “wait for me here.” However in retrospect these things were warning signs of what would happen at my desk.
Many admissions representatives had attempted to get C to come in for a campus visit in the past, including myself. He had no-showed quite a few times so when I called him yesterday I was surprised to hear him say that he wanted to come in that very day and that he was so sorry he missed his last appointment. (He was probably busy stealing cars and punching old ladies in the face.)
C made quite a few excuses to go out to his car through the interview and enrollment process and I assumed it was to smoke. He might have been smoking something other than cigarettes because he frequently would ask the same questions more than once. After my Director met with C, I left him at my desk so I could go make copies and let Financial Aid know that he would be coming over to sit with them. I left C at my desk, with my iphone plugged in on the right hand side and my purse sitting in the cabinet unlocked. While most everything else after this point went incredibly badly for poor C, this opportunity was perfect and he took the phone. I have left that phone plugged in on my desk in front of every student who has ever come to meet with me, so I suppose this was bound to happen but I am simply shocked by C’s actions. How in the world is the likely $20 profit from the phone worth the moral implications of theft against someone who has been so helpful!? I mean, he indicated he was hungry and I brought him Pizza from Orientation for God’s sake!!! I felt like Giselle in Enchanted when she sits down all sweet and cuddly with that old man on the street and he smiles then takes her tiara off her head and runs away. “You…..Are not a very nice old man!!”
While C met with Financial Aid to size up David’s cubicle for more possible loot, I was back at my desk looking for my phone. I quickly determined that I hadn’t taken it anywhere, it was not at the desk and therefore C had taken it. My Director went with me to the FA office, and from the cube next to David’s we called my phone. Now the phone was on silent but I was hoping I could hear it buzz. Oh was I ever in luck, not only did it buzz, but C, being the not so savvy criminal that he is, pulled the thing out of his pocket to silence the buzzing. All this I witnessed as I casually walked by!! So now I had the evidence but needed to determine my move.
The Director of the school advised that we could not accuse him (even though it was IN HIS HANDS) so I walked back over and simply asked him if he accidentally picked the phone up. Well now I have never seen someone’s eyes expand to the circumference that his did at that moment. He is lucky those things didn’t pop right out of his head while he answered that no, he just had his own phone. This is when he pulled his own phone out of the pocket that my phone had been in when I walked by. So C must have panicked when he saw me stroll by and decided the best way to not get busted was to simply move the phone to a different pocket.
At this point I realized that I was actually going to have to let this punk walk out the door and go home with my phone and there was nothing what so ever I could do about it. Off he went into the horizon, the proud owner of my cute little iphone with all my PETA and Disney apps in its case that my friend Becca gave me. I knew I would never see it again and was already dreading the craptastic flip phone from 1989 I would have to buy to replace it because I can not bring myself to buy a new iphone at retail!
As soon as C walked out of the building, my phone started going to voicemail when everyone called it. I guess he didn’t want to talk to my friends, how rude. Cristy came up to the school to assist in the investigation but more to prevent the melt down she predicted over this phone situation. We called the police and had my service suspended on the phone. When the police man (I am going to call him Frank but in reality I didn’t get his name which I feel really badly about because I would like to write him a thank you letter) arrived I gave him the whole story along with all of the contact information that we had for C. Frank called C’s home phone, where C lives with his Mom, so his Mom answered the call. Mom gave Frank C’s cell phone number so we could call him on that line. So guys, get this, C ANSWERED the phone and spoke to Frank! It was unbelievable. The conversation went something like this:
Frank: “I want you to think very carefully about how you answer this question because the consequences could be severe. Did you accidentally pick up a cell phone when you visited Brown Mackie College today?”
C: “Yes, I did.”
Frank: “Bring the phone back up to the school now and you will not get in trouble.”
C: “Ok, I was already on my way to bring it back, but I am scared because I don’t want to have to see Ann.” (GUILT!)
Frank: “Well dude, you are just going to have to man-up and do it.”
Well of course I assumed he was just trying to get Frank off the phone, but maybe, just maybe, he would bring that phone back to me!! We waited, we paced, we took bets, we examined every car that came into the parking lot (by the way, sorry to the chick that was picking up her boyfriend from classes, you probably felt uncomfortable when you pulled up and two girls and a cop pointed and studied your car and demeanor wondering if you were C’s girlfriend sent in his place. That must have been awkward.)
Soon enough, lo and behold C drove up with my phone, got out of his car, and handed that thing right back to me!! I couldn’t believe it. He apologized for the “accident” because my phone “fell into his books” of which he had none, and said he thought my phone was his, even though he then had two phones. Whatever, I thanked him for bringing it back and we watched him walk off muttering with his head down about how he felt so stupid. Yeah, buddy, I bet you do.
To make this story even funnier (funny now, not funny then. Actually it was even kind of funny then) C’s reason for signing up for the Business Program at our college is so that he and his buddy can open up their own Pawn Shop! So one could say that he was simply stocking inventory, not stealing.
It remains to be seen whether C will show up for Financial Aid and Orientation tomorrow. With all the phone hubbub I forgot to remind him about his appointments, silly me.
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Admissions
Frustrations in Admissions Part Whatever
(I don't care what part it should be...I'm frustrated)
There are new people on our team; new people in admissions always start off well. They come in all guns blazin’ like Sarah Palin on crack and for some reason kick ass their first few months. It’s incredibly annoying. It is extra annoying due to the following reasons.
Competition for leads is on par with the battles in the Triwizard Tournament. Internally we compete against each other for the inquiries like wolves who have been starved for a week, viciously ripping the pages as we fly through our call lists. Our rep room used to be like a basket of kittens with full tummies – all sharing and considerate of each other…that is, until the leads dried up. We have a new system whereby one half o f the team gets leads and the other half has to scavenge the jungle of disconnected numbers and angry folks who have been called 989 times in the last two days.
Externally, we compete with the thousands of other schools these students have as options. It’s like a ridiculous episode of the Bachelor and we are a bunch of desperate, lonely, attention starved, hungry girls begging for the attention of one douche bag. It reminds me of Sorority Rush. Pick me, pick us, we are the best, we have x, y and z. If we dance while we show you the brochure will you pick us!?
Things will seem better if/when I am finally able to get back in the top tier and am fed some leads. Today I thought I might climb out of the bottom of the bucket by having some appointments show up so that I can be rewarded with leads. However all four of my appointments no-showed so I was viciously flicked back to the bottom again. I love my job when I actually feel like I am helping people change their lives. For now I will have to sit here in my cube like the runt who can’t reach the teat watching everyone else eat. It’s a sad, sad scene!
(I don't care what part it should be...I'm frustrated)
There are new people on our team; new people in admissions always start off well. They come in all guns blazin’ like Sarah Palin on crack and for some reason kick ass their first few months. It’s incredibly annoying. It is extra annoying due to the following reasons.
Competition for leads is on par with the battles in the Triwizard Tournament. Internally we compete against each other for the inquiries like wolves who have been starved for a week, viciously ripping the pages as we fly through our call lists. Our rep room used to be like a basket of kittens with full tummies – all sharing and considerate of each other…that is, until the leads dried up. We have a new system whereby one half o f the team gets leads and the other half has to scavenge the jungle of disconnected numbers and angry folks who have been called 989 times in the last two days.
Externally, we compete with the thousands of other schools these students have as options. It’s like a ridiculous episode of the Bachelor and we are a bunch of desperate, lonely, attention starved, hungry girls begging for the attention of one douche bag. It reminds me of Sorority Rush. Pick me, pick us, we are the best, we have x, y and z. If we dance while we show you the brochure will you pick us!?
Things will seem better if/when I am finally able to get back in the top tier and am fed some leads. Today I thought I might climb out of the bottom of the bucket by having some appointments show up so that I can be rewarded with leads. However all four of my appointments no-showed so I was viciously flicked back to the bottom again. I love my job when I actually feel like I am helping people change their lives. For now I will have to sit here in my cube like the runt who can’t reach the teat watching everyone else eat. It’s a sad, sad scene!
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Disney World Tips
Ann’s Disney Tips
I am frequently asked to help friends plan Disney trips of their own. This I LOVE so please NEVER STOP DOING IT!! However I have found that many times I am racking my brain to make sure I don’t forget anything so I decided it would be prudent to create a list of my most important tips. Now, there are a million books and resources for planning Disney vacations and I do not wish to imply that you can not find my tips in those comprehensive guides, however unless you are like me and you actually enjoy reading those cover to cover (which I doubt) then this list can give you a good way to start the planning process more quickly.
Do be reminded that personal preferences come into play when planning a Disney vacation. Your own family’s needs and values might be different from mine so additional research somewhere like allears.net or the Disney Website itself can ensure you don’t miss something you might enjoy. For example some little ones might take pleasure in the quiet paths and play areas of Tom Sawyer’s Island, whereas I believe it to be less exciting than waiting in line for Peter Pan. Additionally, I don’t like things that spin, so keep that in mind!
• First choice to make is a resort. All of the Disney resorts have the things that make staying on Disney property totally worth it. First of all there is free transportation to and from the airport. It is called Disney's Magical Express and you make the arrangements when you book your vacation. It is fabulous. Easy and fabulous, and ensures you get the Disney treatment from the moment you step off of the plane! Also, there will be free and convenient transportation all around the Disney Property, which is why you won’t really need a car rental unless you plan to leave Disney property. There is really no need to leave; it is called Disney WORLD for a reason! The only reason I can think of is to buy gum (they don’t sell it, so bring it with you if you are a gum addict or have stinky breath,) or to go to another Theme Park like Universal but why in Walt’s name you would you do that? Seriously, why? Also, in staying on Disney Property you benefit from Extra Magic Hours which means that people staying in a Disney resort get into one of the parks early or can stay late each day. My favorite benefit is never having to leave Disneyness and remaining submerged in the magic and that famous customer service the entire time you are vacationing. You will go to bed and wake up with a smile on your face! I absolutely love hanging by a themed pool riddled with detail and character while having a drink at the pool bar. Talking to people from other places and goofing around with those bar tenders with the sun beating on my back has provided me with some truly priceless memories. The newest and perhaps most significant benefit to staying on property is utilizing the Magic Bands. Magic Bands have replaced room keys, so they open your room, act as your park ticket, allow you charging privileges with just a touch of the band, and lastly let you pre-plan your Fast Passes (more about the Magic Bands and new Fastpass+ to follow.)
• Disney breaks down the resorts by price: Value Resort - I like All Star Music but by far the most magical Value Resort is the new Art of Animation Resort. It consists of mostly suites but has some regular rooms as well. The theming here is above and beyond while the food in the Quick Service Restaurant is inventive and tasty. Moderate Resort - I have trouble deciding between my favorites in this category!! All are gorgeous, however we did find this time that Coronado Springs (being a convention hotel) offers more for adults while still being extremely kid friendly. Fewer kids meant it was quieter and ultimately for us, less crowded. Moderate resorts have a few more amenities like Table Service restaurants and pool slides. Additionally the themeing is just a little more immersive; you feel like you are in another place! The Deluxe Resorts are the best of the best. Each has quite a few restaurants and the themeing is beyond amazing. Even if you don’t stay at a Deluxe resort do try to visit one or eat there at some point because they are breathtaking. (From your resort you can take a bus to any theme park and then get a bus to the other resorts.) Of the Deluxe my favorites are Animal Kingdom Lodge, Polynesian and the Boardwalk. If you have a large group, there are Family Suites in the All Star Music and Art of Animation or there are cabins at Ft Wilderness which tend to be nice for larger parties and those with kids who need to be able to nap separately.
• Budgeting - everyone has their own approach to budgets. Personally I utilize a spreadsheet beforehand to organize my upcoming expenses. One of our favorite ways to control spending is to purchase Disney Gift Cards for our spending money. This way, every time we purchase something we receive a receipt which gives us our remaining balance on the gift card. That allows for a realistic look at our purchases for the trip.
• If you decide to drive to The World, parking will be free at your resort and then you can utilize all the Disney Transportation after you arrive. “Just sit back, relax, and let us do the driving.” That’s what they really say on the buses…it’s sad that I know that, Anyway…
• Although you can get anything you need at Disney World you might not necessarily want to pay the Disney Prices! I always bring breakfast bars, bottled waters, soda, beer, trail mix, snacks, apples (an apple costs like $3,) etc. This minimizes expenses and helps you not feel like you have to eat huge meals three times a day. It also can save you time allowing you to snack in line for a ride rather than wait in a line at a quick service restaurant, or to eat a bar on the bus ride over rather than fighting with the crowds in your resort Quick Service Restaurant. Disney has a dining plan you can purchase but I don’t usually like to do this because I feel like you end up with too much food. However some big families can definitely save by taking this option. I usually plan on one big meal, one small meal and a snack each day. If you are driving down then by all means bring some alcoholic beverages of your choice. These quickly add up! I figure I save $15 per day on bottled water alone by refilling my water bottles at water fountains. Contrary to popular belief you can bring any food or drink items (other than alcohol) with you into the parks so pack small coolers and ice packs accordingly.
• Dining reservations (ADRs or Advance Dining Reservations) - definitely make these if you want to have a couple of sit down meals (which I highly suggest.) I always book a Character Meal. This way you are sure to get those priceless pictures with the characters without having to wait in the lines to see them at the parks (Characters don’t just wander around the theme parks, they would get mobbed.) Depending on which characters your family likes: Crystal Palace has Pooh, O’hana has Lilo and Stitch, 1900 Park Fare has Alice, Belle, Mary Poppins, Chef Mickey’s has the classic Disney characters, Akerhaus has a Princess buffet and the Royal Table in Cinderella’s castle has all the princesses but you usually have to book that one 180 days in advance because it is so popular. My favorite Restaurant at Disney is a buffet (not with characters, though) called Boma at Animal Kingdom Lodge. AMAZING food. I also like the Sci-Fi Dine in Restaurant at Hollywood Studios, and there is some superb food to be had from around the world in the World Showcase section at Epcot. Allears.net has the Menus of EVERY restaurant from Victoria and Alberts to the snack cart in Liberty Square so if you have picky eaters in your group this can be extremely helpful. Disney divides restaurants into Quick Service (basically fast food, counter service) and Table Service (sit down restaurants with a server, tip involved.)
• I always upgrade my Park Tickets to be "Park Hopper" which means you can jump around throughout the day from park to park. This comes in handy for a number of reasons, and really lets you customize your trip based on crowds, parades, nap times, ride preferences and Extra Magic Hours. Definitely take advantage of getting to the parks right when they open if you can, this way you have one to two hours of virtually no lines until it gets crowded. Then you can take a rest at your room or the pool during the busiest part of the day (noon to about 3 or 4.) Also, Magic Kingdom has an opening show that is NOT to be missed. (I may or may not cry every time.)
• Fast Passes - use them, love them! The Fast Pass system has undergone big changes due to the Magic Bands. The old fast pass system allowed you to retrieve a Fast Pass from a kiosk next to the ride and return at the designated time on that pass to walk right onto the ride. There was no limit but you could not have a new Fast Pass until the time frame on your current pass had expired. The new system is called Fast Pass+ which allows you to pre-plan up to 3 fast passes per day. They can only be in one park, so it makes sense if you plan to park hop to reserve those fast passes for the second park you will visit, as the first park you visit you should arrive in the morning before the crowds erupt and can pass through those lines relatively quickly. If you are NOT staying on property it is extremely important to get to the park when it opens as you have to reserve your time slots at a kiosk in the park. The first kiosk you see will likely be the most crowded with the longest line, so it would be prudent to ask a Cast Member (Disney World Employee) where the other ones are located and head there. You will wait in line there to have a Cast Member assist you adding those fast passes to your park ticket to be used later in the day. If you ARE staying on property, good news. You can choose your Fast Passes far ahead of time through the My Disney Experience App, or have a Cast Member at the Concierge in your hotel reserve them for you, saving yourself valuable park time. Now, I have heard quite a bit of criticism of this new process, however the only one I find to be valid is that the kinks in the process as well as the glitches in the app are still prevalent this early on. But I have no doubt that Disney is addressing these and additionally Cast Members were extremely willing to help us with a few issues we encountered in a timely matter. The new system is going to be great for those folks who, unlike myself, haven't studied and mastered the various ways to avoid lines, and thus will be able to plan their Must-Dos ahead of time. Also the new system prevents one from having to go to a ride, retrieve the Fast Pass, and return back to the same spot later on. With the Fast Pass+ the guest only need visit that ride/area once. I am happy with it and excited about Disney's commitment to advancing guest experiences through technology.
• Waterparks and More Ticket Option - I usually do not add this. There is simply so much to do other than the theme parks (visiting other resorts, Downtown Disney, Pool, etc) that you don’t need to have the waterparks unless someone in your family is a HUGE waterpark fan.
• Water Bottles/Mugs - buy water bottles once or bring them with you and then fill them up in the water fountains. I have seen families with a water bottle for each person with their name and a Disney Character on them, to make them seem more exciting! Additionally at your resort you can get a refillable mug (cost depends on the length of stay, maxing out at about $17) for Soda and Coffee which is useful for members of your family who will drink a lot of those items. I don’t buy one because I don’t drink Coffee or Soda, and keep in mind that you can only fill them for free at your resort, not the parks!
• Take Ponchos, rain can pop up and umbrellas are too hard to navigate in the crowds. They can also be used to cover up a stroller that is left outside at one of the stroller parking areas while you ride so your stroller doesn’t get drenched!
• I absolutely can NOT wear any shoes other than gym shoes for walking around The World and I highly recommend extremely comfortable shoes. That being said you might benefit from a lesson I learned my last visit. Bring TWO pairs of gym shoes. My first pair got absolutely soaked during a torrential down pour and they were not even close to dry the next day. Two consecutive days of walking in wet shoes inflicted blisters which I shouldn’t describe but the pain is etched in my memory. It felt like I was wearing needle shoes.
• Attire - I usually wear shorts or jeans and a tee shirt, sometimes a sun dress or something a little more dressy at night; however you really don't need ANYTHING dressy unless you plan to eat at Victoria and Albert's or another fancy restaurant. Most spots are very casual as this is a family resort complex with an emphasis on fun rather than formality. However keep in mind this is Disney World, not Kings Island. At the risk of sounding snobby, it costs quite a bit of money to vacation here so you are unlikely to see many bare midriffs or muscle shirts if you know what I mean. Lets call it Classy Casual.
• Fireworks - the Wishes show at the Magic Kingdom (along with a new show projected on the castle right before hand) are not to be missed!! Fantasmic is a technically fantastic and moving show but crowds are difficult and you have to get there very early. If you have little ones you might want to skip this. Illuminations at Epcot is touching and a must-do for me.
• Shows - I tend to shy away from dinner shows and anything that costs extra like Cirque du Soleil, simply because I am usually so busy taking in all the Disney detail that I don't want to pay extra for something when I could be having just as much fun at a park or playing Disney trivia activities offered at the hotel pool. However I have read that the Hoop de Doo Review is an amazing family experience. Something that I do highly recommend is YeHaa Bob at the River's Roost at Disney's Port Orleans Riverside. This show is completely free. Yes, you read that right, FREE! You do have the option of buying drinks and appetizers in the River's Roost Lounge however there is no charge to sit at the tables and watch Bob put on a magical show which will have children and even the grumpiest adults doing the hokey pokey within an hour. Check Bob's facebook or his website to find the nights he will be performing. You will be very happy that you did!
• Downtown Disney – least busy during the day, very crowded at night, but the World Of Disney store has everything you could ever need Disney related and has to be seen to be believed. There are also many excellent restaurants and specialty shops here (including a vegan bakery) and this area is a great way to spend an evening! No theme park tickets required!!
NOTE: If you become overwhelmed with the size, noise and crowds of the Downtown Disney area the Boardwalk Hotel is a wonderful nightime alternative. This smaller version of the Atlantic City walk of the same name is high on charm and low on crowds. They have restaurants, a piano bar, dance club, bakery, carnival style games, shops and a wide array of family activities like carts or boats for rent.
• These are the rides that I DO NOT MISS:
- Magic Kingdom: Space Mountain, Monsters Inc Laugh Floor, Carousel of Progress, Peter Pan, Small World, Little Mermaid, Haunted Mansion, Splash Mountain, Thunder Mountain, Pirates of the Caribbean, Jungle Cruise, Wishes Nighttime Spectacular, Buzz Lightyear SpaceRanger Spin
- Epcot: Spaceship Earth, Ellen’s Energy Adventure, The Seas with Nemo and Friends, Turtle Talk with Crush, Test Track, Soarin, The American Adventure. I love to stroll through World Showcase (“The Countries” as we used to call it) to eat, have drinks, shop and soak in all of the detail. Illuminations – One of my FAVORITE things to do.
- Disney’s Hollywood Studios: Toy Story Mania, Studio Backlot Tour, Tower of Terror, Rockin Roller Coaster, Beauty and the Beast show, Great Movie Ride, Lights Motors Action Extreme Stunt Show, Muppet Vision 3D
NOTE: if you plan to ride Toy Story Mania (which you must, fun for ALL ages) then be certain to reserve a Fast Pass or head there first thing when the park opens as it is notorious for lines up to 2 hours long.
- Animal Kingdom: Festival of the Lion King, Finding Nemo the Musical, Kilimanjaro Safari, Tough to be a Bug, Expedition Everest, Kali River Rapids ( you will get DRENCHED,) Dinosaur, Either the Maharajah Jungle Trek or the Pangani Forest Trails
• Tip for Epcot’s Illuminations: I always arrive at my seating location at least an hour before the show. I prefer the Beer Gardens in the United Kingdom Pavilion. I grab a table by the water or wait for one of those to open and snag it. Camp out here to people watch, send members of the party off to shop and walk around, eat, drink beer or beverage of your choice, pop into the pub to see what kind of entertainment they have in there, and just enjoy the views over the lake. Then take your time heading out of the park afterwards, it isn’t worth it to run when you are that tired at the end of the day. Buses will continue to come for a long time after the park closes
• Hidden Mickeys - Cristy's favorite thing to do is search for Hidden Mickeys. They are everywhere, in the rides, resorts, stores, landscape and restaurants and while you can buy a book which leads you to them, we have found it is much more fun to keep track of them as we find them on every trip in a special notebook. They can be large or small, obvious or conspicuous, so keep your eyes peeled as you go!
• Last but not least, RELAX! This is a vacation; don’t feel like you have to do everything because you will only be disappointed. There isn’t enough time in a month to do everything at Walt Disney World so take time to enjoy your family, drink in the sights and sounds, and notice the detail Disney has injected into every square inch of that place. There are little treasures and treats to be found if you take the time to look!
Have a MAGICAL day!!
I am frequently asked to help friends plan Disney trips of their own. This I LOVE so please NEVER STOP DOING IT!! However I have found that many times I am racking my brain to make sure I don’t forget anything so I decided it would be prudent to create a list of my most important tips. Now, there are a million books and resources for planning Disney vacations and I do not wish to imply that you can not find my tips in those comprehensive guides, however unless you are like me and you actually enjoy reading those cover to cover (which I doubt) then this list can give you a good way to start the planning process more quickly.
Do be reminded that personal preferences come into play when planning a Disney vacation. Your own family’s needs and values might be different from mine so additional research somewhere like allears.net or the Disney Website itself can ensure you don’t miss something you might enjoy. For example some little ones might take pleasure in the quiet paths and play areas of Tom Sawyer’s Island, whereas I believe it to be less exciting than waiting in line for Peter Pan. Additionally, I don’t like things that spin, so keep that in mind!
• First choice to make is a resort. All of the Disney resorts have the things that make staying on Disney property totally worth it. First of all there is free transportation to and from the airport. It is called Disney's Magical Express and you make the arrangements when you book your vacation. It is fabulous. Easy and fabulous, and ensures you get the Disney treatment from the moment you step off of the plane! Also, there will be free and convenient transportation all around the Disney Property, which is why you won’t really need a car rental unless you plan to leave Disney property. There is really no need to leave; it is called Disney WORLD for a reason! The only reason I can think of is to buy gum (they don’t sell it, so bring it with you if you are a gum addict or have stinky breath,) or to go to another Theme Park like Universal but why in Walt’s name you would you do that? Seriously, why? Also, in staying on Disney Property you benefit from Extra Magic Hours which means that people staying in a Disney resort get into one of the parks early or can stay late each day. My favorite benefit is never having to leave Disneyness and remaining submerged in the magic and that famous customer service the entire time you are vacationing. You will go to bed and wake up with a smile on your face! I absolutely love hanging by a themed pool riddled with detail and character while having a drink at the pool bar. Talking to people from other places and goofing around with those bar tenders with the sun beating on my back has provided me with some truly priceless memories. The newest and perhaps most significant benefit to staying on property is utilizing the Magic Bands. Magic Bands have replaced room keys, so they open your room, act as your park ticket, allow you charging privileges with just a touch of the band, and lastly let you pre-plan your Fast Passes (more about the Magic Bands and new Fastpass+ to follow.)
• Disney breaks down the resorts by price: Value Resort - I like All Star Music but by far the most magical Value Resort is the new Art of Animation Resort. It consists of mostly suites but has some regular rooms as well. The theming here is above and beyond while the food in the Quick Service Restaurant is inventive and tasty. Moderate Resort - I have trouble deciding between my favorites in this category!! All are gorgeous, however we did find this time that Coronado Springs (being a convention hotel) offers more for adults while still being extremely kid friendly. Fewer kids meant it was quieter and ultimately for us, less crowded. Moderate resorts have a few more amenities like Table Service restaurants and pool slides. Additionally the themeing is just a little more immersive; you feel like you are in another place! The Deluxe Resorts are the best of the best. Each has quite a few restaurants and the themeing is beyond amazing. Even if you don’t stay at a Deluxe resort do try to visit one or eat there at some point because they are breathtaking. (From your resort you can take a bus to any theme park and then get a bus to the other resorts.) Of the Deluxe my favorites are Animal Kingdom Lodge, Polynesian and the Boardwalk. If you have a large group, there are Family Suites in the All Star Music and Art of Animation or there are cabins at Ft Wilderness which tend to be nice for larger parties and those with kids who need to be able to nap separately.
• Budgeting - everyone has their own approach to budgets. Personally I utilize a spreadsheet beforehand to organize my upcoming expenses. One of our favorite ways to control spending is to purchase Disney Gift Cards for our spending money. This way, every time we purchase something we receive a receipt which gives us our remaining balance on the gift card. That allows for a realistic look at our purchases for the trip.
• If you decide to drive to The World, parking will be free at your resort and then you can utilize all the Disney Transportation after you arrive. “Just sit back, relax, and let us do the driving.” That’s what they really say on the buses…it’s sad that I know that, Anyway…
• Although you can get anything you need at Disney World you might not necessarily want to pay the Disney Prices! I always bring breakfast bars, bottled waters, soda, beer, trail mix, snacks, apples (an apple costs like $3,) etc. This minimizes expenses and helps you not feel like you have to eat huge meals three times a day. It also can save you time allowing you to snack in line for a ride rather than wait in a line at a quick service restaurant, or to eat a bar on the bus ride over rather than fighting with the crowds in your resort Quick Service Restaurant. Disney has a dining plan you can purchase but I don’t usually like to do this because I feel like you end up with too much food. However some big families can definitely save by taking this option. I usually plan on one big meal, one small meal and a snack each day. If you are driving down then by all means bring some alcoholic beverages of your choice. These quickly add up! I figure I save $15 per day on bottled water alone by refilling my water bottles at water fountains. Contrary to popular belief you can bring any food or drink items (other than alcohol) with you into the parks so pack small coolers and ice packs accordingly.
• Dining reservations (ADRs or Advance Dining Reservations) - definitely make these if you want to have a couple of sit down meals (which I highly suggest.) I always book a Character Meal. This way you are sure to get those priceless pictures with the characters without having to wait in the lines to see them at the parks (Characters don’t just wander around the theme parks, they would get mobbed.) Depending on which characters your family likes: Crystal Palace has Pooh, O’hana has Lilo and Stitch, 1900 Park Fare has Alice, Belle, Mary Poppins, Chef Mickey’s has the classic Disney characters, Akerhaus has a Princess buffet and the Royal Table in Cinderella’s castle has all the princesses but you usually have to book that one 180 days in advance because it is so popular. My favorite Restaurant at Disney is a buffet (not with characters, though) called Boma at Animal Kingdom Lodge. AMAZING food. I also like the Sci-Fi Dine in Restaurant at Hollywood Studios, and there is some superb food to be had from around the world in the World Showcase section at Epcot. Allears.net has the Menus of EVERY restaurant from Victoria and Alberts to the snack cart in Liberty Square so if you have picky eaters in your group this can be extremely helpful. Disney divides restaurants into Quick Service (basically fast food, counter service) and Table Service (sit down restaurants with a server, tip involved.)
• I always upgrade my Park Tickets to be "Park Hopper" which means you can jump around throughout the day from park to park. This comes in handy for a number of reasons, and really lets you customize your trip based on crowds, parades, nap times, ride preferences and Extra Magic Hours. Definitely take advantage of getting to the parks right when they open if you can, this way you have one to two hours of virtually no lines until it gets crowded. Then you can take a rest at your room or the pool during the busiest part of the day (noon to about 3 or 4.) Also, Magic Kingdom has an opening show that is NOT to be missed. (I may or may not cry every time.)
• Fast Passes - use them, love them! The Fast Pass system has undergone big changes due to the Magic Bands. The old fast pass system allowed you to retrieve a Fast Pass from a kiosk next to the ride and return at the designated time on that pass to walk right onto the ride. There was no limit but you could not have a new Fast Pass until the time frame on your current pass had expired. The new system is called Fast Pass+ which allows you to pre-plan up to 3 fast passes per day. They can only be in one park, so it makes sense if you plan to park hop to reserve those fast passes for the second park you will visit, as the first park you visit you should arrive in the morning before the crowds erupt and can pass through those lines relatively quickly. If you are NOT staying on property it is extremely important to get to the park when it opens as you have to reserve your time slots at a kiosk in the park. The first kiosk you see will likely be the most crowded with the longest line, so it would be prudent to ask a Cast Member (Disney World Employee) where the other ones are located and head there. You will wait in line there to have a Cast Member assist you adding those fast passes to your park ticket to be used later in the day. If you ARE staying on property, good news. You can choose your Fast Passes far ahead of time through the My Disney Experience App, or have a Cast Member at the Concierge in your hotel reserve them for you, saving yourself valuable park time. Now, I have heard quite a bit of criticism of this new process, however the only one I find to be valid is that the kinks in the process as well as the glitches in the app are still prevalent this early on. But I have no doubt that Disney is addressing these and additionally Cast Members were extremely willing to help us with a few issues we encountered in a timely matter. The new system is going to be great for those folks who, unlike myself, haven't studied and mastered the various ways to avoid lines, and thus will be able to plan their Must-Dos ahead of time. Also the new system prevents one from having to go to a ride, retrieve the Fast Pass, and return back to the same spot later on. With the Fast Pass+ the guest only need visit that ride/area once. I am happy with it and excited about Disney's commitment to advancing guest experiences through technology.
• Waterparks and More Ticket Option - I usually do not add this. There is simply so much to do other than the theme parks (visiting other resorts, Downtown Disney, Pool, etc) that you don’t need to have the waterparks unless someone in your family is a HUGE waterpark fan.
• Water Bottles/Mugs - buy water bottles once or bring them with you and then fill them up in the water fountains. I have seen families with a water bottle for each person with their name and a Disney Character on them, to make them seem more exciting! Additionally at your resort you can get a refillable mug (cost depends on the length of stay, maxing out at about $17) for Soda and Coffee which is useful for members of your family who will drink a lot of those items. I don’t buy one because I don’t drink Coffee or Soda, and keep in mind that you can only fill them for free at your resort, not the parks!
• Take Ponchos, rain can pop up and umbrellas are too hard to navigate in the crowds. They can also be used to cover up a stroller that is left outside at one of the stroller parking areas while you ride so your stroller doesn’t get drenched!
• I absolutely can NOT wear any shoes other than gym shoes for walking around The World and I highly recommend extremely comfortable shoes. That being said you might benefit from a lesson I learned my last visit. Bring TWO pairs of gym shoes. My first pair got absolutely soaked during a torrential down pour and they were not even close to dry the next day. Two consecutive days of walking in wet shoes inflicted blisters which I shouldn’t describe but the pain is etched in my memory. It felt like I was wearing needle shoes.
• Attire - I usually wear shorts or jeans and a tee shirt, sometimes a sun dress or something a little more dressy at night; however you really don't need ANYTHING dressy unless you plan to eat at Victoria and Albert's or another fancy restaurant. Most spots are very casual as this is a family resort complex with an emphasis on fun rather than formality. However keep in mind this is Disney World, not Kings Island. At the risk of sounding snobby, it costs quite a bit of money to vacation here so you are unlikely to see many bare midriffs or muscle shirts if you know what I mean. Lets call it Classy Casual.
• Fireworks - the Wishes show at the Magic Kingdom (along with a new show projected on the castle right before hand) are not to be missed!! Fantasmic is a technically fantastic and moving show but crowds are difficult and you have to get there very early. If you have little ones you might want to skip this. Illuminations at Epcot is touching and a must-do for me.
• Shows - I tend to shy away from dinner shows and anything that costs extra like Cirque du Soleil, simply because I am usually so busy taking in all the Disney detail that I don't want to pay extra for something when I could be having just as much fun at a park or playing Disney trivia activities offered at the hotel pool. However I have read that the Hoop de Doo Review is an amazing family experience. Something that I do highly recommend is YeHaa Bob at the River's Roost at Disney's Port Orleans Riverside. This show is completely free. Yes, you read that right, FREE! You do have the option of buying drinks and appetizers in the River's Roost Lounge however there is no charge to sit at the tables and watch Bob put on a magical show which will have children and even the grumpiest adults doing the hokey pokey within an hour. Check Bob's facebook or his website to find the nights he will be performing. You will be very happy that you did!
• Downtown Disney – least busy during the day, very crowded at night, but the World Of Disney store has everything you could ever need Disney related and has to be seen to be believed. There are also many excellent restaurants and specialty shops here (including a vegan bakery) and this area is a great way to spend an evening! No theme park tickets required!!
NOTE: If you become overwhelmed with the size, noise and crowds of the Downtown Disney area the Boardwalk Hotel is a wonderful nightime alternative. This smaller version of the Atlantic City walk of the same name is high on charm and low on crowds. They have restaurants, a piano bar, dance club, bakery, carnival style games, shops and a wide array of family activities like carts or boats for rent.
• These are the rides that I DO NOT MISS:
- Magic Kingdom: Space Mountain, Monsters Inc Laugh Floor, Carousel of Progress, Peter Pan, Small World, Little Mermaid, Haunted Mansion, Splash Mountain, Thunder Mountain, Pirates of the Caribbean, Jungle Cruise, Wishes Nighttime Spectacular, Buzz Lightyear SpaceRanger Spin
- Epcot: Spaceship Earth, Ellen’s Energy Adventure, The Seas with Nemo and Friends, Turtle Talk with Crush, Test Track, Soarin, The American Adventure. I love to stroll through World Showcase (“The Countries” as we used to call it) to eat, have drinks, shop and soak in all of the detail. Illuminations – One of my FAVORITE things to do.
- Disney’s Hollywood Studios: Toy Story Mania, Studio Backlot Tour, Tower of Terror, Rockin Roller Coaster, Beauty and the Beast show, Great Movie Ride, Lights Motors Action Extreme Stunt Show, Muppet Vision 3D
NOTE: if you plan to ride Toy Story Mania (which you must, fun for ALL ages) then be certain to reserve a Fast Pass or head there first thing when the park opens as it is notorious for lines up to 2 hours long.
- Animal Kingdom: Festival of the Lion King, Finding Nemo the Musical, Kilimanjaro Safari, Tough to be a Bug, Expedition Everest, Kali River Rapids ( you will get DRENCHED,) Dinosaur, Either the Maharajah Jungle Trek or the Pangani Forest Trails
• Tip for Epcot’s Illuminations: I always arrive at my seating location at least an hour before the show. I prefer the Beer Gardens in the United Kingdom Pavilion. I grab a table by the water or wait for one of those to open and snag it. Camp out here to people watch, send members of the party off to shop and walk around, eat, drink beer or beverage of your choice, pop into the pub to see what kind of entertainment they have in there, and just enjoy the views over the lake. Then take your time heading out of the park afterwards, it isn’t worth it to run when you are that tired at the end of the day. Buses will continue to come for a long time after the park closes
• Hidden Mickeys - Cristy's favorite thing to do is search for Hidden Mickeys. They are everywhere, in the rides, resorts, stores, landscape and restaurants and while you can buy a book which leads you to them, we have found it is much more fun to keep track of them as we find them on every trip in a special notebook. They can be large or small, obvious or conspicuous, so keep your eyes peeled as you go!
• Last but not least, RELAX! This is a vacation; don’t feel like you have to do everything because you will only be disappointed. There isn’t enough time in a month to do everything at Walt Disney World so take time to enjoy your family, drink in the sights and sounds, and notice the detail Disney has injected into every square inch of that place. There are little treasures and treats to be found if you take the time to look!
Have a MAGICAL day!!
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